Weekly News Roundup (Nov. 24-Nov. 30)

- British teacher in Sudan sentenced to prison, possible lashing for letting toddlers name a Teddy bear after Muslim prophet. As for the other parties involved, the kids were penalized with a harsher sentence of no naps for a week and removal of all non-primary color crayon privileges.

- Diplomatic relations between UK and Sudan strained after Teddy bear incident, while angry mob calls for the teacher's execution. However, the 'Muhammed bear' has still a way to go before decrowning Mortimer The Traveling Bear as 2007 Most Maleficient Cuddle Toy.

- Shocking study reveals two thirds of NYU students would up give up their right to vote for a year's tuition, while 20% say an iPhone touch would do. Politicians: don't be discouraged just yet. These people are known to drop their price tag after two beers and a roofie.

- Dutch police arrests teenager for stealing virtual furniture from social networking site. Who could have foreseen that technology would provide with all these brand new venues of crime for OJ Simpson to perpetrate and get acquitted of?

- Canadians' beer drinking habit might be a threat to the environment. Dude, first Celine Dion and now this?.

THIS JUST IN: Study Says Waiting Too Long to Have Sex Linked to Sexual Dysfunction Later in Life. Producers of Porky's, American Pie as well as impatient high school boyfriends everywhere to be presented with medal of honor for selfless services in the field of public health.


Not since the times of Helen of Troy has the world seen so much political turmoil over some dusty 'ol piece of rug.